How do you clean your house?
I don’t do it very often, if I'm honest. But WHEN I do it. O boy. You better hide.
It starts with the decision that I want to clean only one part of the house. Let’s say the bathroom. It’s already 9 PM in the evening so I don’t want to take too much time. I want to be efficient, finish it, and go to bed.
But when I start there, I will think about the kitchen. And the bedroom. And then I can’t let go of the thought of dust on the top of the cabinet. As a crazy housewife I rave through the house. Every single spot MUST be clean. And before I know it, it’s 2 AM and I am exhausted.
But what if I stop after the bathroom. Then my mind is bugging me about the rest that needs to be done. And reminds me how I neglected that for too long. And then I only focus on the rest of the house. And I totally forget about the spotless bathroom. That doesn’t seem relevant anymore.
The cleaning is an example of how I approached my work and responsibilities. Thorough. If I didn’t do it 100% right, it was worthless to me. Always feeling guilty about what I could have done more. And better. And sooner.
Sometimes pushing through is a great way to finish things. If I can sleep in the next day: not a problem to rage throughout the house and clean until 2 AM. Finish that sh*t and I'm done for a few weeks (don’t tell my mom). But if I have appointments the next day early in the morning, it’s not so smart. Then it becomes something I don’t actually want. But still do it anyway.
If I always listen to that voice that tells me that there is sooooo much left to do, and that I should have done it sooner, I will exhaust myself. Because sometimes I don’t have the energy to do it. And sometimes I just don’t want to do it.
So. The challenge is. Just finishing the bathroom and: stop there. Enjoy the spotless room. Go to sleep.
That means I need to deal with the dirty kitchen. And the bed that needs changing. And the dust on the cabinet. Just standing there. Looking at it. Feeling the temptation. But just letting it be. And tolerate that feeling of guilt. That is the key to not exhaust myself when I actually don’t want something.
As we speak, my bathroom actually needs cleaning. But you know what. I have other things I want to prioritize now. Tomorrow is another day.