- marlienligtenberg
Do you make resolutions or decisions?
Happy New Year!
I hope you started the year well! I set some goals for this year and I don't call them resolutions. They are decisions.
Resolutions are useless
It's a vague intention without a plan. You can easily say then when you are drinking champagne with your friends on New Years Eve. ''I want to exercise more! Call my mother more often! Pick up that hobby!'' Sure, we all do.

It's going to succeed when you make a decision
A non-negotiable decision. And for me it helps to take some time to make the decision. And connect it to a plan. For example, I want to eat healthier. My exercise is going well (I row 4 times a week, and I have a great structure for that. I am super proud of it)! But I want my diet to be healthier. This is a decision. How did I do that:
Why do I want this? I connect it to a bigger goal for me. My real motivation. Why do I want to eat healthier? Who do I want to be? How is it going to make me feel when I succeed?
Analyzing: what is going well now? And when does it go wrong? What moments do I choose unhealthy and fast food options?
Making a plan: what can I do to prevent these situations? What do I need? Who do I need?
What is a risk? Great plan, but of course I am going to have bad days. What will I do in that case? What reminder can help me? Who can help me? How can I be kind to myself when it happens?
Celebrating! For me, it really works to celebrate what goes well. And not once in a while, but really creating a system for celebrating. Because every time it goes well I prove myself that I stick to my decisions! Woooow! That is beyond amazing! That is so cool! That positive feeling keeps me going.
(Yes, making this plan takes a bit of time! Take 10 minutes for every question and divide that over 5 days. Done. For me it's the only way I to make a decision sustainable).
I think we often avoid decisions because it's scary.
Because if you really, really decide there is a risk. Disappointing yourself. That is a such a shit feeling. But trust in yourself grows by starting. Deciding, making a plan and going for it. The only way you build self-esteem is to prove in little steps that you can do it!
What would it bring you if you can trust yourself this year?